A life of music
by StevieScissorLuv
Summary: Every chapter will be wrote around a song and one or more of the characters, if you review a song and a character/characters you want me to use, I will consider including it. I swear the chapters are gonna be so much better than the summary. This chapter's song will be Emergency by Paramore.
1. Hero

_**Hey everyone.**_

_**I was just listening to this song and I got this idea.**_

_**The song in this chapter is 'Hero' by Superchick, I recommend you listen to it if you haven't, its a great song.**_

_**I hope you like it.**_

_**Enjoy.**_

* * *

'_No one sits with him, he doesn't fit in__  
__But we feel like we do when we make fun of him'__  
_

* * *

"Get out of the way, nerd" a big guy says pushing the skinny pale boy down on the way to class.

That boy starts to pick up the books just to get them accidently kicked away by some girls.

"Oops, ha, didn't see you there, -cough- freak -cough" one of the girls with blonde hair says laughing mockingly.

* * *

'_Cause you want to belong, do you go along?__  
__Cause his pain is the price paid for you to belong'_

* * *

They're in class now.

"Pssst, hey! Nerdo" one of the cool kids say, his friend sitting silently beside him not saying a word.

"What?" the boy ask, though knowing he shouldn't, he just wants to get through this lesson and go home

"You know no one likes you, right? Not even those people you hang out with, they just pity you, you know why? Because you are pathetic" the guy spits in the already broken boy's face.

"Oh, is the baby gonna cry" the guy says, taunting the poor boy.

"You are such a loser, isn't he Jordan" the guy says, looking to his quiet friend.

The boy looks to the poor, broken boy trying not to cry.

"Er, yeah! Such a loser" the boy, no longer quite has made his decision.

* * *

'_It's not like you hate him or want him to die__  
__But maybe he goes home and thinks suicide'_

* * *

When he goes home that night he feels like giving up.

He looks at his father's hunting kit his gun, and he wonders what it would be like to die, just end it.

His phone rings, it's his 'friend', no not his friend, they dont like him, they pity him.

* * *

'_Or he comes back to school with a gun at his side__  
__And a kindness from you might have saved his life'_

* * *

He knows what he's doing now.

He grabs that gun, hides it in his school bag.

He denies a ride to school, he wants to walk today.

He takes a deep breath and enters the school.

He puts his hand in his bag and holds it, feeling the cold metal in his hand.

He pulls out the gun and shoots the ground once, getting their attention.

The people look at him, terrified.

Jordan looks on from where he is standing, maybe if he had done something that day, he could have stopped this.

The redheaded girl that he's loved for so long, walks over with her other friends.

They try to calm him down, they really do love him, but he can't see it.

"Robbie, please dont do this" the redhead says, close to tears.

* * *

'_No one talks to her, she feels so alone__  
__She's in too much pain to survive on her own'__  
_

* * *

She is always alone, she tries to hang out with a group of people nearly every day, just to get rejected, they dont like her, they dont want her.

She is in so much pain, it's getting too much to handle.

She want her sister to notice, talk to her more, like they used to.

But her sister has other friends now, she doesn't need her older sister.

She is trying to survive, to survive on her own.

* * *

'_The hurt she can't handle overflows to a knife__  
__She writes on her arm and wants to give up her life'_

* * *

The first time she does it, she doesn't even think, she sees the scissors her sister's friend had left behind, they were perfect.

At first she just scratches skin, there's no blood, but a week's go on she changes her weapon of choice, she starts to use a razor she pried out of a pencil sharpener.

She loves the pain, one day she writes on her arm, using the razor, 'fat pig', just a couple of the horrible words she has been called.

* * *

'_Each day she goes on is a day that she's brave__  
__Fighting the lie that giving up is the way'__  
_

* * *

She barely gets through a day, it's not living for her, just surviving, though she's not sure she wants to anymore, she's so tired.

When she's not at school she's in her bedroom, sleeping or cutting.

Her grades have fallen behind.

Sometimes she feels that giving up is the way, but she hasn't yet.

* * *

'_Each moment of courage her on life she saves__  
__When she throws the pills out a hero is made'_

* * *

But one day it gets too much, she runs home from school, tears cascading down her face.

No one is home yet, she runs into the kitchen.

She opens the cabinet that contains all kinds of pills and she takes a pot of sleeping pills.

She runs to the bathroom, she empties the pill pot onto the floor and picks 10 up, she runs into the bathroom and locks the door, just encase someone gets home early and tries to save her, she's to far gone to be saved anyway.

She sits on the closed toilet seat, her hand shaking with the 10 of the sleeping pills in it.

She thinks of her family and her dreams and she realises how much she would miss them, how much she wanted to live, for a bit she forgot all those horrific words and taunts and she dropped the pills on the floor, some rolling under the door.

She heard her sister banging on the door, maybe she does care.

"Trina!" she screams.

* * *

'No one talks to him about how he lives  
He thinks that the choices he makes are just his'

* * *

The first time he tried it, it was because he wanted to feel numb and he wanted to get away from life for a bit.

This was his choice, he wanted to do it.

He got it from an old friend.

* * *

_'Doesn't know he's the leader with the way he behaves_  
_And others will follow the choices he's made'_

* * *

He didn't think of his younger brother the first time he did it, didn't think of the consequences.

But now he doesn't care.

He likes the drugs they make him feel alive again.

They help him relax sometimes, sometimes they give him terrifying hallucinations.

* * *

_'He lives on the edge, he's old enough to decide_  
_His brother who wants to be him is just nine'_

* * *

He is 18, he's old enough to make his own choices, and he did.

He buys an RV and parks it in his parent drive way, now he has privacy.

The wrong choice, but he likes it.

But his nine year old brother has always looked up to him, wanted to be him, now he doesn't understand why his brother acts so strange now.

Is this really the kind of role model that he wants to be?

The drug gives him nightmares, he sleeps with a knife.

This scares his brother, he doesn't understand why.

* * *

_'He can do what he wants because it's his right_  
_The choices he makes change a nine-year-old's life'_

* * *

He says he can do it, because he's allowed, its his right, to have a choice.

He has made lots of choices in his life, not knowing how it would affect his little brother, not knowing how much his brother looks up to him.

He's lying, high, on the battered sofa he owns in his small RV.

No cares in the world.

He doesn't even here the metal door open.

His brother walks over, football in hand.

He nudges him softly.

"Beck, Beck, I wanna play footy, Beck" the nine year old says.

"Maybe later, bro" he says, closing his eyes.

But. when will later come?

* * *

_**I hope you liked this chapter.**_

_**Review a song you would like me to use in the next chapter, and who you would like to be associated with it or certain parts of it.**_

_**If I get no review that contain song ideas for the next chapter, I will just pick a song myself, so get reviewing, or PM me.**_

_**Bye everyone.**_


	2. BFB

_**Hey everyone.**_

_**Thank you**_**XOheypoepleXO1**_** for this song idea, much appreciated.**_

_**I hope you like this chapter.**_

_**The song used in this chapter is 'My best friends brother' sung by Ariana Grande and Victoria Justice.**_

_**Enjoy!**_

* * *

_**Tori-**_

'_I call you up when I know he's at home,__  
__I jump out of my skin when he picks up the phone'_

* * *

I call her home phone, knowing he's there, but still I my breath hitches when I hear his voice.

* * *

'_Why can't I tell if he's looking at me?__  
__Should I give him a smile?__  
__Should I get up and leave?'__  
_

* * *

I'm round her house, she's in the kitchen and her brothers sitting on the sofa opposite me.

I can't tell if he's looking at me.

Should I smile at him politely, or should I just go to her in the kitchen.

* * *

_'I know it's strange, I don't know what I'm thinking__  
__But is it wrong if I see him this weekend?__  
__I really hope I can get him alone__  
__I just don't, don't want her to know...'__  
_

* * *

I know it's a terrible thought and that its incredibly strange, but is it that wrong if I see him this Saturday?

I really want to get him alone, and I know it's bad, and I dont want her to know.

* * *

_'Yeah__  
__My best friend's brother is the one for me__  
__Yeah__  
__A punk rock drummer and he's 6 foot 3'_

* * *

It turns out he's in a band and he's the drummer, how hot is that.

He's so much taller than me, I love tall guys.

He is my best friend's brother, and he's definitely the one for me.

* * *

'_I don't want to but I want to, cause I just can't get him out of mind! And__  
__Yeah'_

* * *

I really want him, and I want to ask him out, but I dont, because he is my friends brother.

I cant get him out of my mind, not matter how hard I try to.

* * *

_'My best friend's brother is the one for me__  
__BFB, BFB__  
__My best friend's brother, my best friend's brother'__  
_

* * *

I am certain that her brother is the one for me, but she is my best friend, I dont know what to do.

* * *

_'I kinda think that I might be his type cause when you're not around__  
__He's not acting to shy__  
__Sometimes I feel like he might make a move__  
__Is this all in my head?__  
__I don't know what to d_o'

* * *

He usually acts so shy when she is around, I dont know why, I think I might be his type, I hope I am.

I think he is going to make a move, I just have a feeling, am I right or is this all just in my head?

I am really confused, I have no idea what to do

* * *

_'I know it's strange, I don't know what he's thinking__  
__But it is wrong if I see him this weekend__  
__I really hope I can get him alone__  
__I just don't, don't want her to know__  
__Yeah__  
_

_My best friend's brother is the one for me_  
_Yeah__  
__A punk rock drummer and he's 6 foot 3__  
__Yeah__  
__I don't want to but I want to, cause I just can't get him out of mind!__  
__Yeah__  
__My best friend's brother is the one for me__  
__BFB, BFB__  
__My best friend's brother, my best friend's brother__  
__BFB, BFB__  
__My best friend's brother, my best friend's brother'_

* * *

'_Cause he's such a dream__  
__And you'd know what I mean__  
__If you weren't related'__  
_

* * *

If he wasn't related to her I would definitely have asked him out by now, but I am a good friend so I shouldn't.

He is such a dream, he can be a bit weird sometimes, but he is so good looking.

* * *

_'Yeah__  
__MY best friend's brother is the one for me__  
__Yeah__  
__A punk rock drummer and he's 6 foot 3__  
__I don't want to, but I want to__  
__Cause I just can't get him out of mind and...'_

* * *

He is always on my mind, I want to be with him, but if I go out with him, she will hate me for sure.

I hate myself because I can't get him out of my mind.

* * *

_'Yeah__  
__My best friend's brother is the one for me__  
__BFB, BFB__  
__My best friend's brother, my best friend's brother__  
__BFB, BFB__  
__My best friend's brother, my best friend's brother'_

* * *

Cat's older brother is the one for me.

* * *

_**I hope you liked this chapter.**_

_**Sorry if it doesn't make much sense at parts.**_

_**Dont forget to review what songs you want used along with the character/characters, or PM me.**_

_**Bye everyone.**_


	3. Never growing up!

_**Hey everyone.**_

_**Thanks for the idea **__**XOheypoepleXO1**__**, also I will be using one of **__**JadeKnowsHerEnemy**__**'s song suggestions in the next chapter.**_

_**I hope you like what I did with the song.**_

_**Enjoy!**_

* * *

_Singing Radiohead at__the top__of our lungs__  
__With the boom box blarin' as we're fallin' in love__  
__Got a bottle of whatever but it's gettin' us drunk__  
__Singin' "Here's to never growing up"...__  
_

* * *

All of them are at a party Tori is throwing, lots of people are there, even people from Northridge, that she didn't invite...

Cat and Robbie are making out near the boom box, Cat letting out a high giggle between kisses.

Jade and surprisingly Tori are slumped against the stairs drinking something, maybe its beer, but it's definitely get them drunk, so it's doing its job.

Jade and Tori are singing loudly to the song that is on, and eventually their friends join in too.

* * *

_Call up all our friends__  
__Go hard this weekend__  
__For no damn reason__  
__I don't think we'll ever change__  
__Meet__you at the spot__  
__Half past ten o'clock__  
__We don't ever__stop__  
__And we're never gonna change__  
_

* * *

She called up all her friends again for another party, this time a different place, an abandoned warehouse, Jade's idea of course.

This time there is any alcoholic beverage they could find.

Cat's brother knows a guy who sells alcohol and drugs, we dont ask.

The party starts at 10:30 and there is even more people there than last time, they've multiplied like cockroaches.

We dont stop, we are partying way into the morning.

* * *

_Say, won't you say "forever"__  
__Stay, if you stay forever__  
__Hey, we can stay forever young__  
_

* * *

We wish we could stay like this forever, we wish we could stay young for the rest of our lives.

* * *

_Singing Radiohead at the top of our lungs__  
__With the boom box blarin' as we're fallin' in love__  
__Got a bottle of whatever but it's gettin' us drunk__  
__Singin' "Here's to never growing up"...__  
__We'll be running down the street, yelling "kiss my ass"__  
__I'm like yeah, whatever, we're still livin' like that__  
__When the sun's going down, we'll be raising our cups__  
__Singin' "Here's to never growing up"...__  
_

* * *

We're playing Radiohead and everyone is singing it at the top of their lungs until their voices are hoarse.

The boom box is blaring loudly, making it impossible for anyone to have a proper conversation.

On a dare all six of us run the street yelling "kiss my ass!" as loudly as we can without thinking about consequence, living life to the fullest.

The suns going down and we raise our intoxicating drinks into the air and scream "here's to never growing up!"

* * *

_Oh whoa oh__  
__Oh whoa oh__  
__Here's to never growing up__  
__Oh whoa oh__  
__Oh whoa oh__  
__Here's to never growing up_

* * *

_We live like__rock__stars__  
__Dance on every bar__  
__This is who we are__  
__I don't think we'll ever change__  
__They say "just grow up"__  
__But they don't know us__  
__We don't give a fuck__  
__And we're never gonna change__  
_

* * *

Half way in we go to a bar, ordering every drink in sight.

We dance to ever song we hear, even the lame ones because we dont give a fuck.

Sometimes people tell us to grow up, but fuck them, they dont know a thing about us and nothings gonna change, we're never gonna change.

* * *

_Say, won't you say "forever"__  
__Stay, if you stay forever__  
__Hey, we can stay forever young_

* * *

_Singing Radiohead at the top of our lungs__  
__With the boom box blarin' as we're fallin' in love__  
__Got a bottle of whatever but it's gettin' us drunk__  
__Singin' "Here's to never growing up"...__  
__We'll be running down the street, yelling "kiss my ass"__  
__I'm like yeah, whatever, we're still livin' like that__  
__When the sun's going down, we'll be raising our cups__  
__Singin' "Here's to never growing up"...__  
_

* * *

Radiohead is on again, this time Jade and Tori are making out besides the boom box, while Robbie does shots off of Cat's bellybutton while Beck drunkily cheers him on.

Andre has taken his shirt off and is spinning it around above his head, shouting "here's to never growing up".

* * *

_Oh whoa oh__  
__Oh whoa oh__  
__Here's to never growing up__  
__Oh whoa oh__  
__Oh whoa oh__  
__Here's to never growing up__Say, won't you say "forever"__  
__Stay, if you stay forever__  
__Hey, we can stay forever young__Singing Radiohead at the top of our lungs__  
__With the boom box blarin' as we're fallin' in love__  
__Got a bottle of whatever but it's gettin' us drunk__  
__Singin' "Here's to never growing up"...__  
__We'll be running down the street, yelling "kiss my ass"__  
__I'm like yeah, whatever, we're still livin' like that__  
__When the sun's going down, we'll be raising our cups__  
__Singin' "Here's to never growing up"..._

* * *

Cat's brother has come to the party this time, him and his guy.

He refused to give Cat any of his 'magic dust' as Cat likes to call it.

So she feels left out when she see Jade and Beck daringly snort up the stuff.

She so desperately wants to try that she snatches a small bag of it when nobody is looking at her, instead looking at the reaction Robbie has when he eventually tries the drug.

Cat copies the others and inhales the dust so quickly she almost falls over from the dizziness and the kick she gets from it.

Andre is the first to notice when he turns around and sees the white powder on her nose.

"Here's to never growing up!" she belts out loudly, run into the buzzing crowd.

* * *

_Oh whoa oh__  
__Oh whoa oh__  
__Here's to never growing up__  
__Oh whoa oh__  
__Oh whoa oh__  
__Here's to never growing up__  
__Oh whoa oh__  
__Oh whoa oh__  
__Here's to never growing up__  
__Oh whoa oh__  
__Oh whoa oh__  
__Here's to never growing up_

* * *

_**So, what did ya think?**_

_**I hope you liked this chapter.**_

_**I worked hard on it, but I did have a bit of trouble when I had the repeating verses.**_

_**Dont forget to review and PM what songs you want used.**_

_**Bye my song birds (sorry, just wanted to test that out).**_


	4. Emergency

_**Hey everyone, sorry I haven't updated in months, my laptop has been broken.**_

_**In this chapter I am going to be using one of **_**YO Elizabeth Just Ate**_**'s (used to be **_**JadeKnowsHerEnemy**_**) song suggestions like I said I would in the previous chapter.**_

_**I hope you like this chapter.**_

_**Enjoy.**_

* * *

_I think we have an__emergency__  
I think we have an emergency_

_If you thought I'd leave, then you were wrong_  
_Cause I won't stop holding on_

* * *

That's what my dad said to me one night after they fought, again.

He always reassures me that he will never leave my mum, or me and my brother.

* * *

_So are you __listening__?  
So are you watching me?_

_If you thought I'd leave, then you were wrong_  
_Cause I won't stop holding on._

* * *

Mum holds onto the hope that they can hold onto their love, their marriage.

They married young, when they were both my age, they were 16.

* * *

_This is an emergency  
So are you listening?_

_And I can't pretend that I don't see this  
_

* * *

No matter how hard I try, or how many times Jade tells me it's normal for parents to argue, I just can ignore it.

I saw my mum making out with another man, more than once and one time that man slept over while dad was on a business trip.

* * *

_It's really not your fault  
That no one cares to talk about it,  
Talk about it  
_

* * *

Jade told me that when I tried to talk to my dad about it, he didn't believe me.

She tells me it isn't my fault.

* * *

_Cause I've seen love die  
Way too many times  
When it__deserved__to be alive  
(When it deserved to be alive)_

* * *

Jade's parents divorced when she was younger, she's never really gotten over it I dont think.

She didn't want her parents to divorce, she wanted them to be a big happy family, and she said she doesn't want to see the same thing happen to my family, but she believes me, unlike my dad.

She was really upset when he and Beck broke up, she didn't deserve that.

* * *

_I've seen you cry  
Way too many times  
When you deserve to be alive, alive  
_

* * *

Jade has seen me cry many times over my parents fighting, and I've seen her cry over her parents splitting up, sometimes she doesn't realise I'm there when she does though.

* * *

All my parents ever do now is fight, they used to play board games with me and my brother every Friday night, they dont anymore.

* * *

_So you give up every chance you get  
Just to feel new again_

* * *

My mum apologised to my dad for cheating on him, he forgave her and gave her another chance.

The next night when dad was away I saw her leave the house to go to a bar with her new 'friend' Harold.

She came home the next morning hung-over and smelling of men's aftershave.

When my dad questions her about it she hits him, bad.

One time me and my brother had to take him to the hospital, we lied and said he fell down the stairs.

Dad tells us its fine, that mum is just showing him love, and I dont get how what she does to him is love.

* * *

_I think we have an emergency  
I think we have an emergency  
_

* * *

My dad is home less and less now, and when he comes, home he comes home late and smelling of beer.

This is weird, dad has never gotten drunk before.

* * *

_And you do your best to show me love,  
but you don't know what love is.  
_

* * *

Dad does his best to show me and my brother love, but I dont think he knows what love is anymore.

I caught him beating my brother last week, I'm worried for him and I am afraid that I will be next.

* * *

_So are you listening?  
So are you watching me?  
_

* * *

I stuck up to him once, after he beat my brother unconscious, he was about to step on his hand to break it, so I yelled at him to stop.

He did stop, and he just hit me instead.

* * *

_Well I can't pretend that I don't see this  
_

* * *

I told mum what dad's been doing, I foolishly thought and hoped that she would do something to stop him, I was wrong.

She slapped me and just ignored it, pretended she didn't see dad hitting my brother.

I've even seen him hit mum now and she hasn't been out of the house in over a month.

* * *

_It's really not your fault  
That no one cares to talk about it,  
Talk about it  
_

* * *

Is what I think Jade would say to me if I told her, but I can't because she will call the police and they will arrest my dad.

He has done nothing wrong, he is just showing me and my brother love, he loves us, he loves me.

* * *

_Cause I've seen love die  
Way too many times  
When it deserved to be alive  
(When it deserved to be alive)  
I've seen you cry  
Way too many times  
When you deserve to be alive, alive  
_

* * *

Mum left us, this pissed dad off a lot, and he blames me for scaring her off.

Jade sees me cry more than usual, but I dont tell her that mum left us or that dad beats me, I just lie and tell her that mum and dad are still fighting, she usually believes me or just lets it go, but recently she has started getting more suspicious, especially when I show up to school with a huge bruise covering my face.

* * *

_These scars, they will not fade away.  
_

* * *

I have got both emotional and physical scars, my dad has started carving words into me with his pocket knife.

Just today he carved the word 'bitch' into my arm.

* * *

_No one cares to talk about it, talk about it  
_

* * *

It's the summer holiday now, Jade wanted me to go to Florida with her and her mum for a month, but my dad wouldn't let me.

My brother has gone off to college so my dad has been hitting me more than ever.

I have no one to talk to about it, Jade is in Florida, Andre is too busy looking after his grandma, Beck is in Canada, Robbie is too occupied with his new girlfriend Rebecca and Tori can't see past all her problems long enough to see that I am hurting.

* * *

_Cause I've seen love die  
Way too many times  
When it deserved to be alive  
(When it deserved to be alive)  
I've seen you cry  
Way too many times  
When you deserve to be alive, alive_

* * *

Jade sings this song at my funeral, she blames herself when she really shouldn't, it is not her fault, I should have told her what was going on.

All my other friends are there, they are all upset.

* * *

My brother gets the call when he is at college, Jade tells him that I'm dead and this breaks him, I have never seen him cry before, not even when dad would hurt him, all I wanna do is hug him and tell him it's ok, like he used to do with me.

* * *

Robbie dumped his girlfriend and barely left his house, he only leaves when he has to go to school now and sometimes not even then.

Jade doesn't talk anymore, not to anyone, she goes to school still but it's a struggle for her to get out of bed, she always visits my grave, she just sits there and cries.

Beck tries to be there for Jade, he wanted to rekindle their relationship as well but she didn't, he respected her decision but he still hangs out with her, she doesn't talk so he usually just holds her and comforts her.

Andre blames himself for my death as well, he regrets not talking to me when I needed someone to talk to, I dont blame him either though, it's not his fault, it turns out his grandmother was ill and he needed to look after her, she dies a few months after my funeral and Andre ends up living with Tori.

Tori isn't as self involved as she used to be after my death, she is less open and she only speaks when spoken to, she cheers up a little though when Andre moves in and they start dating after a couple weeks of him living with her.

* * *

Jade speaks for the first time since my death after a year, she is at my grave, and she confesses her love for me, not best friend love or even sisterly love, but romantic love, she breaks down crying after this.

I try to hug her and comfort her, tell I love her too, but I'm just a ghost so I go right through her and she can't hear me.

I think I just made it worst because she starts to cry even more.

The fact that I can't help her would kill me if I wasn't already dead, all I can do is stand there and watch her lean against my gravestone crying.

* * *

After just a month in prison, my dad hangs himself with his bed sheets, Beck called him a coward.

No one can find my mum, so no one tells her about my death.

After a year of searching I find out that she had moved to Africa, she's there now, hasn't drunk any alcohol since she left, she has a new family, a baby girl and a baby boy, they are happy.

This enrages me, my death is her fault, she was the one who blackened my dad's heart, she killed me and my dad.

* * *

_**Wow, this turned out a lot longer than I thought it would.**_

_**Keep sending in song suggestions and check out my other fanfics.**_

_**I hope you liked this chapter.**_

_**Bye everyone.**_


End file.
